No kidding dept: It’s been buzzed about in the blogosphere so it comes as no surprise that Cloverfield director Matt Reeves is in talks to direct a Cloverfield sequel. Since I mostly hated Cloverfield, this is definitely something I’m not rushing out to see – unless they ditch the stupid Blair Witch school of cinematography angle. (He has also been signed to direct “The Invisible Woman,” according to Variety, but it will likely come after the Cloverfield sequel.)

The real question is, since the Cloverfield/ Slusho monster – whose origin annoyingly isn’t even hinted at in the movie – has destroyed most of the portions of New York City near the Statue of Liberty, what else is there to destroy that isn’t more of the same? And if the military and air force couldn’t destroy the monster, who can? Where’s John Rambo when you need him? He’d know what to do. If he doesn’t, then the sequel could spawn yet another TV reality series. The Slusho monster destroys a different city each week, and the Extreme Home Makeover crew rebuilds the week after. (Sorry, didn’t take my meds this morning.)

A funny thing happened to me on the way to the theater. I went to see a movie and ended up at a thrill ride. But I paid for 85 minutes of Cloverfield and only got about 7 minutes of thrill. And what thrill that 7 minutes was.

Cloverfield, which topped the box office on its opening weekend but dropped to fourth this past weekend, is unlike any movie I’ve ever seen. But that’s neither a compliment nor an insult. Actually, it’s both. This is the third completely different review I’ve written for Cloverfield because I have had a hard time capturing it exactly.

On the one hand, I have a review full of “bitter critic” banter at not trusting my gut instinct about how crappy this movie would be. In my long experience of watching movies, I’ve learned not to go see any movie that’s been as hyped as Cloverfield has. And it really stinks. Sort of.
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Give Me A Break Dept: The much-hyped loved Cloverfield movie will have it’s own monster toy from Hasbro. It has two interchangeable heads, is 14 inches tall, aimed at kids aged 4 and up (yeah, right), and costs – wait for it – US$100. Ok, $99.99. Like I said, give me a break. Are parents going to go for that? Will they even have a chance? It’s going to be a collector’s item, and I’m guessing that no matter how much I hate hyped movies (especially those that appear to be shot on a handheld video camera), box office returns suggest that there are more than enough fans that’ll snap this toy up, before any kiddies get a chance to get their grubby mitts on them.

Hasbro no image on the product page, but Variety reports that it won’t ship until Sept. 30.

Oh, and for those keeping track, there are probably not only sequels coming for Cloverfield but an Internet campaign to keep the hype buzz going until then. If you haven’t seen the movie, you’ll just have to keep guessing at what the monster looks like.

[via: io9]

What do the Cloverfield monsters look like? Check out the drawings at Film School Rejects, supposedly produced by fans that have seen the special pre-screenings of the movie (source: Unfiction Forums). The one shown above is the closest in likeness, but it and the others are not actually the Cloverfield monsters. They are definitely nothing like Cthulhu, so H.P. Lovecraft fans will have to wait.

Maybe Hellboy 3, rumored to be in the planning stages as a followup to this year’s Hellboy 2: The Golden Army, could have a nod to Cthulhu. I always felt that some of the creatures in Hellboy 1 were vaguely reminiscent of Lovecraft. I say that without doing deep research about the creator of the Hellboy comics and that person’s influences. However, I’m hypothesizing that many horror writers/ comics creators are influenced either directly or indirectly by Lovecraft.

If I’m not mistaken, Berni Wrightson, a master of the macabre, was influenced by Lovecraft (and Edgar Allan Poe – but then who wasn’t?), and Wrightson in turn has influenced a new generation of horror artists and writers. Speaking of Wrightson, whyn’t anyone ask him to do a Hellboy poster. Or Cloverfield, once the movie is out?

By the looks of the Cloverfield movie poster, this is a ‘disaster’ movie. The head of the statue of liberty is missing, and the background shows buildings burning. But a Slashfilm post gives details that director Matt Reeves has revealed in various interviews. It’s a monster movie, though there have yet to be any visuals – either in stills or trailers – of the monster. That’s supposedly to build “dread and anticipation.”

J.J. Abrams is producing, so it’s not surprising the trailer for the next Star Trek – which he’s also producing – is attached to Cloverfield. The latter is out on Jan 18th. Note that depending on which Cloverfield trailers you watch, it either looks really boring or really exciting. A more exciting clip is below, but no monster appears. My bets are on a Gojira or Mothra monster.